Two guys walk into a bar. The third guy ducks.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was a red light and it was his turn to cross.

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Doctor, Doctor, I feel like I don't know anyone... Uh...who are you?

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Susan boyle has a belly button, Simon has a belly button, Because its only normal.

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree, He was dead

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie

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I had sex with your mom. It was f*cking terrible.

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Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

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A women in her kitchen hears a thud outside. Her husband fell off the roof.

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Yo mamma's so fat, at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that if she did not attempt to control her weight gain through a careful moderation of her diet and began exercising on a regular basis, that her obesity would soon manifest itself in a variety of chronic health conditions that would permanently alter her ability to enjoy life and could significantly decrease her lifespan.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time is irrelevant in this scenario because if this question is based in the United States it is highly unlikely an elephant will be near a fence you own, let alone sit on it, an activity rarely done by elephants and usually projected by humans onto other animals.

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Two penguins are sitting on an ice flow. One says to the other: "hey--you know, it looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other one says, "who says I'm not?"

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Have you ever heard the story of Mikey Braford? Every morning when he was little, his father would fill a gym sock with nickels and beat him with it. Mikey has severe attachment disorder and frequent suicidal thoughts.

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Why id the Jew keep putting his name at the end of anti jokes? He was an attention seeking big nosed virgin kunt

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She said no

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Chuck Norris didn't count to infinite twice. He can't even do it once.

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I had a date. She was a pegasister. Since MLP was magical, I disappeared.

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Yo mamas so fat that she decided to get a gastric bypass to help lose the weight.

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A horse walks into a barn.

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what's the difference between "rita , sue and bob too ," and rocky II ? rocky II is about boxing

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Wanna know something funny? Your face

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An English man walks into a pub.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops