Why did the man name his son David? He didn't. It was his wife's choice.

Knock Knock? Who's There? Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson who? Shut up and give me ma dam candy women!

How many unicorns does it take to change a light bulb? 17. 11 if its Tuesday.

Yo mamas so fat.

Violets are Blue, Roses are Red, skip the bull$%!#, and give me head

This is not mean't to be a joke, but I have noticed the least popular thing on here is the Jew and the Pizza joke. I am Jewish and find this extremely offensive. I applaud all of those who gave it a negative vote and realize the Holocaust is not a laughing matter.

A man accidentally forgets his daughter at a Sizzler

Looking for propane accessories? Well look no more!

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

A policeman walks into a bar. He goes inside to greet his friend who happens to be the bartender. Another man walks into the bar. This man is a regular customer and goes to the bar almost every other night. The policeman leaves and goes back on duty.

What do you call a black man who has become a millionare? A financhaly successful buisnessman who worked hard to be where he is today.

What's a black man's favorite food? It depends.

What do you call a tree with no branches? A stick.

what did reed read? the most recent anti-joke

Why did the chicken cross the road... He wanted to get away from all those jerks who kept asking him why he made the decisions that he did. he later committed suicide...

Your mom is so fat that she has to wear large clothing.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Provolone

why was the guy stranded on an island? because his boat crashed.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It can never be certain, as chickens are incapable of communicating.

What do you do when you have 2 eggs, but only want to use 1? I don't know. I guess you could just use 1 of them and save the other for another time?

Why did the gecko cross the road.... Because he saw great deals on car insurance!!!

Why can't Anne Frank drive? Because she's dead.

Why did the dog cross the road? He saw a fish.

the old man fell down the stairs and broke his leg, he then went to the hospital and got a cast. later that day he went home and ate soup

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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