whats the difference between a white kid a nd a puerto rican kid? one smells fine and the other one smells like he walked out of a butcher shop that sells cigars and cheap prostitutes

Why cant penguins fly? because they cant

Q: Why didnt the irishman walk out of the bar? A: He died of severe alchoholism and had a heart attack and died istantly

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

how do you make a door cry? twist its nob

What's black and white and red allover and can't fit through the door? A nun with a spear through her neck

Paul howley can't drive, phahahaha

I spilled Spot Remover on my dog. Now he is blind and has chemical burns all over his body.

Three Jews walk into a bar. One says something to the other two, but it was in Yiddish, and I don't speak that, so I don't know what he said, but all of them laughed really hard, so it must have been funny.

What happened to all of the happy birds flying over the field? They were all suddenly stricken by the bird flu and died.

Why did the potato commit suicide? Forget that. Why was the potato alive in the first place?

What's the difference between a white man and a black man? The white man comes from European descent and the black man comes from an African descent. This leads to the difference in their skin color.

What do you call a dead baby lying in the road? A Tragedy

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz "Somebody left the gate open"

Why did the man cross the road? To attend his wife's funeral.

I TOOK A STEAMING SHIT ON YOUR MOM

Do you know what's not right? Left.

Two guys are walking down the street. One asks the other "Nice weather today, huh?" And the other responds "It sure is," and they both continue on with their days.

Roses are red Violates are blue Go to hell I hate you

Wanna hear a joke? Once upon a time, there was a successful Mexican.

Why did Sam have no friends? Because he was dead.

So a man is sitting at a bar with about 20 girls sitting all around him. Amazed at this man's ability to pick up girls, another man asked him how he did. In response, the man said, "What?". The man wasn't able to hear the other man, due to the fact that there were many girls talking.

Why was the little girl blowing bubbles in the swimming pool? Because she was drowning

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and mild nudity.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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