Hey I just meet you And this is crazy I took bath salts Your face looks tasty

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Paul and Steve, Siamese twins attached at the head, come to a fork in the road they are traveling. Paul wants to go left, while Steve wants to go right. They pause for a moment to figure out which direction would be the best choice for the both of them. They decide to go Paul's way, and as they continue to travel in silence, they try to imagine what life as a self-reliant individual would be like.

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two nuns were driving in Transylvania when a vampire jumps out in front of their car the first nun said "show it your cross" so the secong got out of the car and yelled Get out of the way you pric!!!!

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terry stockton is straight

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Knock knock Who's there? An elf. An elf who? An elf who wants to be a dentist.

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How do you make friends with a squrriel? Trust me, don't.

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I was at the ocean, and I saw a screaming fish. Then it died.

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Roses are red Bacon is too Rhyming is hard bacon

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How many dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dogs do not have aposable thumbs therefore they cannot screw in light bulbs

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How do you punish an electrician? Kill his family.

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want a balloon? yeah

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Knock Knock Whos there? Jonny Jonny who? Jonny tsunami, hope you can swim Japan

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why do birds fly away when you go near them? incase your black

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How did the blonde girl get pregnant? Her boyfriend used a condom left in his pants and then was washed. Making it defective and causing her her to become pregnant.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? The bench can support a family.

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Man 1: WHAT THE HELL?!?! Man 2: There is no verb in that sentence

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What is worse than spending time with in-laws? Nothing.

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A man has only two fingers on one hand, and everybody calls him two-fingered Mike. Why? Because his fingers were lost in a tragic accident at birth, and his parents, who were considering calling him Mike, decided to lengthen the name because it seemed appropriate.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A: It didn't, some dude ran it over.

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How do you kill a circus? Go for the Juggler!

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whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

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Why did the Mexican push his wife off a cliff? Because after twenty long years of monotonous nagging, he finally snapped.

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Why wasn't there a rainbow? It didn't rain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops