why did the chicken cross the road because it wanted to get hit by a car

Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

Why did peter shake the baby? To kill it and rape its dead corpse

Yo momma's so fat that her weight is completely disproportional to the average weight of someone her age.

A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya" the man replies: "whisky."

Why did sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by an 18 wheeler Knock knock Whos there not sally

find the o 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duh its up top

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

What is worse than a badly told joke? A badly told Anti-joke.

how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

A thief stole a calendar. Later, feeling guilty, he returned it to its owner, admitted his misconduct, and went to a local minimart to purchase his own.

Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

How did the mexican die while fixing a lightbulb? He fell off the ladder.

Chuck Norris got his ass kicked. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

What do you call a man with an arrow to the knee? An ambulance because he's got a serious leg injury right there.

How do you catch a unique animal? You get professional hunters to catch the animal.

Why did Johnny disappear? He was sucked into a vacuum toilet on an air jet.

Why did the black women sing to the left to the left? Answer: because black people have no rights

A duck walks into a bar and says, "Put it on my bill"

why did the kids pull the fire alarm? because there was a fire.

If you are riding on a boat and all the wheels fall off, how many pancakes would it take to make a dog house? It does not matter because fish don't like tomatoes.

Why did the boy run down the road? Because he was being chased by a tsunami

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? The chain broke.

A blonde went to a hair dresser's one day, listening to a walkman. The hair dresser asked her what she wanted, and the blonde replied, "I need to get my hair trimmed, just make sure that you do not take these headphones off." The woman looked at the blonde, surprised, but did as she was told. While she was brushing the blonde's hair, she accidentally bumped the headphones, knocking them to the ground. As she bent down to pick them up, the blonde fell over, onto the floor. The hair dresser was very confused. She picked up the head phones and listened. This is what she heard..."breath in...breath out...breath in...breath out..."!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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