How may Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

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Why did the girls ice cream melt? She was on fire.

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What's red, white and not blue. A Canadian flag

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Tom: God! Matt:Where? Tom:Matt i was saying God ! Jesus! Matt: God and Jesus! wow! Tom: why am i talking to you? Matt: Wanna play a game? Tom:bye.

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where would you find a blind man's car? exactly where he left it...

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What did John look at when Meghan Fox took off her shirt? her undershirt

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I'm HIV positive.

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A man walks into a bar he said oww when did this metel bar get here

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What did the Africans get for dinner? Nothing.

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Why are black people not allowed to play football? They are.

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watched pride and prejudice last night. I hate period dramas... too much blood

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Whats red and black and has 8 legs? 4 dead african babies.

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A mass murderer ran into a bar full of people. He first shot a man. What did the man say when the murderer shot him? Nothing, he was hit in the head and instantly died before he could say anything.

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roses are red violet is blue why rik go to the hospital ? cause he eat glue.

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Why was the little kid bullied? Because kids are goats.

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A janitor walks into a bar. He cleans the bar.

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why did the tortoise cross the road? it does not matter, it got hit by a vehicle and died on impact.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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What's better than seeing a Detroit Lions game? Not being in Detroit.

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Q: What's blue and smells like grass? A: Blue grass.

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What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

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Why didn't the Mexican go to college? He was caught smuggling drugs over the border and was shot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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