A woman is hit by a car. Thankfully she manages to survive, but the driver is fined a lot of money for speeding.

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ok... let me think of something good! Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below! ok... let me think of something good! Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below! ok lets... wait.. wtf I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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Why was little Timmy so fast? Because he's tied up in the trunk of a speeding car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I lied, it was a goat.

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roses are brown violets are brown, who took a shit in my garden

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Girl you must be Jamaican...because you're black and annoying.

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Why did the fisherman go to Alaska? The commercial fishing business is strong there and it was a sound financial decision.

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#Divorced, beheaded and died! #Divorced, beheaded, survived! # He's Henry VIII, he had six sorry wives #Some might say he ruined their lives!!!!!!! #Catherine of Aragon was one. # She failed to give him a son #He had to ask her for a divorce. #That broke her poor heart of course. #Young Anne Boleyn, she was two #Had a daughter, the best she could do #He said she flirted with some other man #And off with the chop, went dear Anne! #Lovely Jane Seymour was three! #The love of his lifetime indeed! #She gave him a son #Little Price Ed #Then poor old Jane...went and dropped dead! #Divorced, beheaded and died! #Divorced, beheaded, survived! #He's Henry VIII, he had six sorry wives #Some might say he ruined their lives!!!!!!! #Anne of Cleeves came at four #He fell for the portrait he saw! #But laid eyes on her face, and cried #SHE'S A HORSE! I MUST HAVE ANOTHER DIVORCE! #Catherine Howard was five #A child of nineteen, so alive #She flirted with others, no way to behave #The AXE sent young Cath to her grave! #Catherine Parr, she was last #By then all his best days were past #He lay on his death bed, aged just fifty-five! #Lucky Catherine- the last stayed alive! #I mean, how unfair! #Divorced, beheaded and died! #Divorced, beheaded, survived! # He's Henry VIII, he had six sorry wives #You could say he ruined their lives!!!!!!! And the moral of the story is: Never buy a car without knowing it's background.

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What do you do when your girlfriend is bleeding? She is probably on her period.

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How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail it to the ground

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I regret everything.....

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a dog and a duck went out for a meal they both ordered lobster and enjoyed the night.

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Two pandas walked into a bar. The bar was in china.

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roses are red hula is hula when i walk in cass i see a big tula

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Why couldn't the surgeon perform surgery? Because he was in court being sued due to the fact that he administered too much anesthesia to a patient, who later died of overdose..

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Why did Captain Obvious crossed the road? Because that's the name of the chicken

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? a guy who copies antijokes on ant joke.com

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My girlfriend dumped me because I'm patronizing. That means I treat people like they're stupid.

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Hey babe, are you a refrigerator? -No... Good--'cause I wanna f*ck you so hard. Best pickup line. Always works.

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Q: Why did the Asian boy pass the math test? A: By studying with dedication to the field.

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What worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

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Q: What is the fastest way to get insulted? A: Go screw yourself m0therf0cker!

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A train poops its pants.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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