Q: Why did the bear fall out of the tree? A: Because humans tranquilized him, brought him to an animal shelter 100 miles away from his home. Then after he got out he got hit by a car and died. PETA is watching.....always

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ADAM FANTUZZI SUCKS KIRANS BALL SACK

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Why don't traffic lights go swimming? Because they aren't sentient or animate, and therefore can't decide to undertake such an activity. Even if they were sentient, they wouldn't enjoy swimming as the water would damage their electrical works.

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A man and a woman are in a bar. The man says, "Excuse me miss, but you're very attractive, may I please buy you a drink?" to which the woman replies, "Thank you very much, but I'm afraid I've never been to Mexico."

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Out of Jill, Jason, Jesse, Jane and Harold, which one is the odd one out? Jason, because he only has one arm.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? It's hard to say, as this number depends on a large number of factors including the average area covered by one lick, the pH of saliva, the solubility of Tootsie Pops, the temperature of both the saliva and the Tootsie Pop, and the amount of saliva deposited on the Tootsie Pop after each lick. This is not to mention all the manufacturing irregularities that may occur during production, and varying tongue shapes and solvency properties of saliva.

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Why did the old man miss the Alzheimer's Day walk? Because he died in his sleep.

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Justin Beiber

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How can a man go 8 days without sleeping? Sleep at night.

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seek beauty

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Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

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What's worse than 9/11? FaZe Banks' upload times

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Why was the black man driving a plane? because he was a pilot, you racist.

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What do bluejays and cardinals have in common? They both Were born during the Medevil period.

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What's upside down? umop apisdn

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What did the boy to it's grandad........ UR COuSIN¬

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Whats more sad then four black men in a car driving off a cliff? The man they stolen the car from doesn't have car insurance.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I really hate poultry related jokes.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. But if you answered poop you aren't wrong.

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"Docter, docter, I think I have cancer!" "I don't really care."

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whats similar between a eagle and a armidillo? they both can fly. apart from the armidillo.

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How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a brick at it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get slaughtered.

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What did the mexican fireman call his twin sons? nothing. they were stillborn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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