What do you get when you cross Winter Squash, Beets, Ham, Coffee, Spinach, Hexamine, Cadmium, Detergent, and some love? A bowl full of crap.

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Why can't Michael Jackson swim? Because he is dead.

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What do you call a man with no friends? Terry

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How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a rock at it

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Q:Why was the blond so dumb A: She had downsidrome

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Q: How do you make a clown stop laughing? A: Hit it in the face with an axe

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Why was the black man holding the knife in such a particular manner? Because he was getting dinner ready for his family.

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Why does everyone hate on justin beiber cause its easy

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What's the difference between an X-box and Michael Jackson? One is an inanimate object and the other is a human being.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie...

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What's worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it? Getting brutally raped by a giant transvestite donkey witch.

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What is worse than being unemployed? Terminal Cancer

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Whats worse than a son killing his own father? His biological father finds him, 10 years later.

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A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" *This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.*

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I hate Jews The Holocaust

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What do you call a creepy person trying to break into your house? A robber

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Why did the fall off the building? ... because I pushed her

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A man walks into a bar and gets drunk. He then goes home and proceeds beating his many wives in a drunken fit of rage.

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friends are like snowflakes. if you piss on them they go away

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Whats funnier then two babies falling off a cliff? 2 babies falling off a cliff

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What do you call a guy with alot of money? A rich guy.

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence in prison.

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Why can't a blonde swim? Because in this economy her parents never took her to a pool in which she could get swimming lessons and practice to be able to be a good or maybe great swimmer.

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There are 3 types of people in this world; people who can count, and people who can't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops