a older brother and a lil brother have bunk beds, one night the older brother has his gf sneak over, they are going to have sex. he tells his gf, "say lettace for a new positon and say tomato for stop", they start and she screams, "lettace, tomato, lettace, tomato". then the lil brother says " will you guys stop making salad, ur getting mayonase all over my face!!!!"

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What did dick Cheney say to his friend that he accidentally shot in the face while quail hunting? Sorry for shooting you in the face

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't know any better. It very recently was decapitated in order tofeed the farmers family.

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who should be competing in the paralympics? Brent the retard!

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homosexual rights to marriage

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Yo mamas so ugly that when she looked out the window, she was arrested for mooning.

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Going out for a quiet one, having a drink or two, and returning home.

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Q: What did Michael Jackson do while he was preparing for his newest world tour? A: He died.

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Ryan Holden is a faggot.

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Yesterday I was walking my dog and while I was walking my dog, guess what happened? It got hit by a bus.

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Why did Sally sell seashells by the seashore? Because she has no arms and couldn't find a job.

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Why did this website get run into the dirt? Because you they let idiots like me post whatever I want. _CamelJocky

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Why couldn't the fan turn on? Because it was broken.

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Knock Knock! Come in..

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How does Steven Hawkings refresh after a long day of work? F5

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Q:Whats worse than a dead baby in a barrel? A: 8 dead babies in a barrel. Q: Whats worse than that? A: A dead baby in 8 barrels.

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My friend Keith found a worm in his apple. He ate it anyways

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A man goes to the movies with his wife, two hours later they drive home and find their house just the way they left it.

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My children are mistakes

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What is the longest sentence that a man knows? If it is used it in context, isn't round and the speaker attempts to quote the whole number - or at least all of it known to date, then any sentence involving the value of pi.

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Wanna hear something funny? David is addicted to mw3 like the other 3 million people!

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Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

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Please don't tell anybody about me, or I will be hunted down, taken from my family, and be objected to a life of cruel exploitation.

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so a black guy goes to a hot dog eating contest how many does he eat? enough to win.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops