Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? You did?! Oh . . .

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What did the blonde say when she was asked what color her hair was ? Blonde.

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Knock knock! Who's there? The doorbell wasn't working.

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Why was little Jessica missing?? She was stuck in the freezer.

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You're tall.

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A blonde walks into an electrics shop and asks to buy a television set. The shop-owner explains that she is signalling a microwave and is concerned for her mental wellbeing.

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I forgot my joke about gamblers, but i bet you would have loved it!

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A:Why did the chicken cross the road? B:To get The Daily.....Do you get it. A:No. B:Me neither..I get The Times.

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What do you get when you put a frog in a paper shredder? Harshly punished by the Animal Humane Society

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Boyfriend: Why are you so negative all the time? Girlfriend: I'm not! I'm positive! Boyfriend: No your not your arguing with me right now and you... Narrator: The girl takes the pregnancy test and shoves it in the guys mouth kicks him in the nuts and runs out the door.

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What is better then winning the special olympics? Not being retarded

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor? Because she had no arms or legs.

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A monkey walks into a bar. Monkeys are always funny.

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how do you make a little girl cry?? Kill her family

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Easy, you get a phone with a recorder that rather than playing a "please leave a message after the tone", plays the same tune as if the phone was still not picked up. Now tell me here and now, because I wont waste more time on you, what part did you play in this? Jenny Chatterton? Another one of your pseudonyms? What the fuck did you think would happen? You live in the Uk, london, so, tell me everything, or I will share every single detail here.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Holy crap, the garden's on fire.

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Whats faster than a black man running away from the cops? The speed of light.

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What did the zombie say to the woman? I like turtles.

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Poop!!

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What was the joke about that woman with altsimers again? Ironically I forgot.

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What did Helen Keller name her pet dog? dfhiwueghweigw

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Fine, just give me the top comment FOREVER, and I wont LIEK completely copy and assimilate your identity on Horsehead network... Forever... Muahahahahahaha!

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Why was little Johnny sad? His parents were killed in an awful fire

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What's the difference between a horse and a unicorn? Horses are real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops