What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

knock knock come in!

your mother is so fat that she bought a treadmill and uses it daily. she already lost 20 lbs.

Why didn't the family finish their picnic? Because a dog was sick all over the food.

Why did the middle-eastern man fly his plane into the Empire State Building? Because he was a bad pilot with an interest in American architecture.

Wanna know what is gross? a dead baby in a dumpster. Grosser? Ten dead babies in a dumpster. Grosser? There is a live one at the bottom. Grosser? It ate its way out. Grosser? It came back for seconds.

A little boy walks up to his father and asks him a question, "Daddy, how are babies born?" His father then replies in an enthusiastic manner, "You see, I stuck my dick in your mom's vag and started pounding. Apparently two condoms defeat the purpose."

An Irishman walks out of a pub. Just kidding.

Women's Rights

yo mamas so dumb she named her house butt and her son crack and then she called the police saying I looked all over my butt and i can not find my crack.

When an intellectual was told by someone, "Your beard is now coming in," he went to the rear entrance and waited for it. Another intellectual asked what he was doing. Once he heard the whole story, he said: "I'm not surprised that people say we lack common sense. How do you know that it's not coming in by the other gate?"

What did the fly say to the frog? Nothing, insects can't talk.

Knock knock Who's there? Taco Taco who? Taco bell

Why don't carrot tops souls ? They just don't

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

68

What did the black man do when his car was rear-ended? He exchanged insurance information with the other driver.

You know your in deep shit when you hit somebody in the head with a 2 by 4 and they dont go down.

- What do you call a black man who drives a bus? - An african american bus driver.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in the designated crosswalk area and there was no oncoming traffic.

Erectile Dysfunction.

A man walks into a bar, and says to the bartender, "Do you know where the library is located?" The bartender describes to him that the closest library is three blocks down, next to the red brick building with a green roof.

There once was a man from Nantucket. He had no distinguishing characteristics whatsoever.

Why dont black people go on cruise ships Theyre not falling for that one again

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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