What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why can't the T-rex clap? Because it's extinct

thumb_up thumb_down +31

what is a bike without wheels? not a bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A horse walks into a bar. He was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q. What's the difference between a Mcdonalds employee and a gynecologist? A. They have different jobs.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Where's the best place to buy moon bars? Michael Toal

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man and his wife are sitting on the couch in their house, watching tv. The man says, "Do you smell smoke?" The woman then replies, "No." They then proceed to watch more tv.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

wanna hear a joke? yes

thumb_up thumb_down +29

why did the kid fall down the stairs? he had polio

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton, and Pamela Anderson all have in common? All of their last names end with an "n"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

thumb_up thumb_down +27

FUS RO DAH!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

to get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call it when you kill a Jewish homosexual? Murder.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Where was little Sara when the bomb went off? Everywhere. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" Sara's hands

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Do you want to hear a joke?!?!?!?!?!?! A happy orphan

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Tell me you're a rapist. You're a rapist. This joke makes no sense. Mashed potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the wife scream when she saw her husband? Because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +25

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why can't helen keller drive? She never got her permit

thumb_up thumb_down +25

have you seen ray charles' house? neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops