... Chan chan

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What did the man with tourettes yell on an airplane? He yelled bomb, and was gunned down by 2 federal marshals, one of which's stray bullets happened to hit a small child with autism.

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I spilled spot remover on my dog. Needless to say he received a bath that night.

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why couldn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell of a building? She was wearing mittens.

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What's greasier than a baby? A burger

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Q: why was the women out of the kitchen? A: Probably to partake in one of her many hobbies.

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What do you call a hit and run victim with multiple injuries? An ambulance.

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Why did the boy tell the fly to eat the cheese? A: because he wanted him to

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Roses are red violets are blue I have boobs and so do you

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Do you want icecream, Björn?

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How long does it take a black woman to have a baby? Nine months, give or take a few days depending on whether she goes into labour early or not.

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What happens when a black man is alone the KKK appears

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What do an Eagle and a sugar cube have in common? The fact that if let to disintegrate they both turn slowly to hydrogen after a period of time.

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What kind of cheese isn't yours Nacho Cheese actually it depends on the type of cheese that you stole due to your kleptomania

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A man walks into a music store and hears dubstep playing in the background and he says, "Ugh! I hate dubstep!" Suddenly the clerk gets extremely offended and says, "Haters gonna be gay!" The man chuckles at the clerk's remark and shakes his head. "No no no silly," He said. "Haters gonna not be deaf." He says shaking his head as he walks out. The clerk tries to elaborate on what the man meant, but he realizes he cannot hear his thoughts.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Theres a crazy ass alpaca ready to take a shit on you

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Why did twenty mexicans run down a hill? There was a marathon in the area.

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Why did the crocodile cross the road? It is actually highly improbable that such a large reptile would be in a residential area where such roads would exist.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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A pedophile walks into a Nursery. He get's arrested.

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What do a grape and an elephant have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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What's worse than a spray tan? - A spray tan of hydrochloric acid.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Not the Twin Towers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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