Why did the man buy fruits at the store? Because they were available, on sale, and the man was hungry, so he wanted to eat fruit at that time, he then got into his car, but thought to himself first, "I should unlock my car so I can open the door," so he does so, and sits in the drivers seat eating his fruit, he drives off to his home, arrives safely, and greets his family as he enters the house, then they sit down, eat dinner, and go to sleep, the next day, the man goes to the store, and buys vegetables

What did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? AIDS

Hey, i just met you. And this is crazy! But im on bathsalts ! *GAUH* Your face looks tasty!! :D

what did the big chimney say to the little chimney ?? your to young to smoke

There were 2 drunk men. Man 1:im planning to buy the world. man 2:you cant. man 1:why. man 2: cause im not gonna sell it.

What did Hellen Keller name her dog? Her parents named it Spot; Hellen Keller isn't able to speak due to her handicapped muteness.

An asian is doing math hw then his dad drives through the door

How many Nazis does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Their domestic handiness was not impeded by their warped sense of entitlement and racial superiority.

Why didn't the man stop at the stop sign? He was violently killed turning at the last intersection

WEED!

Isn't everyday "black tie optional"?

How much wood would Chuck Wood have if Chuck Wood could have wood? None, Chuck Wood has E.D.

What did the sheep say when he broke a leg? Nothing, sheeps can't talk.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them.

What's worse than opening your pantry door and finding nothing desirable to eat? Repeated high voltage electrical shocks to the anus.

What do you call a horse with no legs? Useless.

I pooped.

What's worse than a baby in a trash can The holocaust

who ever is reading this....

There once was a man from Nantucket... Who was fiscally responsible.

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes

Yo' Momma is so fat she weighs a lot!

There is no I in Pie except for the I

what did the doctor say to the guy with a bullet in his arm you have a bullet in your arm

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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