Why did the woman lie down? She was dead

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A drunkard stumbles into the bar. Now he's got thousand's of dollars in medical bills.

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I like it in the butt. - Tyler James Nehring. Call me if you want to give me the d. 863-670-1547

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house. A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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I can't hear music. I am a sentence.

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A lobster walks up to an octopus. What does he say? Nothing. Lobsters cannot talk.

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What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

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What name does Steve Bartman go by Now? Steve Bartman, but he just hides all day trying not to be killed.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Me! Hi

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What did the Arab do when he got frustrated? Burned himself

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What's big, red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What is brown and sticky? Syrup.

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What do you call a flying jew? Smoke.

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You know what they say about a guy with big feet? He wears large socks and has big shoes.

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What does Patrick say? IM PATRICK!!! IM PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK!!!!! PATRICK!!!!!

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I really might try and kill myself when I get home tonight.

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Miranda Cosgrove's singing career. ......Thats it. Thats the joke.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and deaf, and to put her behind the wheel of a motorized vehicle would be extremely dangerous.

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What's the difference between a fine wine and a dead baby in a blender? One gets better as it ages, and the other is a horrific accident.

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a woman came back from a long vacation, one of her male employes noticed that her breast were much larger, "wow, did you get a boob job?" he asked. she replied "no i have breast cancer"

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Q: How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Well considering the weight of a fly is 1.2 grams, and the weight of a light bulb is 50 grams (and this is assuming that the fly can lift its own body weight) it would take 41.6 flies. But also considering the fact, that the .6th of a fly is impossible, because it is more than likely to be deceased, it is impossible for flies to screw in a light bulb.

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why was it funny that the boy got a razor for christmas because he had leukemia

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Marilyn Manson was walking to church.

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Q: What's worse than finding 1 worm in your apple? A: Finding 2 worms in your apple Q: What's worse than finding 2 worms in your apple? A: The Holocaust Q: What's worse than the Holocaust? A: Finding 3 worms in your apple!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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