Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

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How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

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So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

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Roses are red, violets are blue; So give me head, or I queue you!

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Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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What do you get hanging from an apple tree? Sore Arms.

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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What gets bigger and bigger and bigger, then dies? A baby.

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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=3

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What would Bruno Mars do if he was on the moon? Gasp and grab his throat in an attempt to get oxygen flowing into his lungs with no avail.

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Q. what has 2 tums and a boner. A. a horny guy <3

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What's a Gigawat? I made it up.

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Roofs are Red...I have a Cunt!!!

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Why was the blonde so stupid? She suffers a severe case of retardation.

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what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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y momma so fat that she's heavy

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

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Q: What do you call a white sheet on the floor? A: A ghost costume, dirty laundry, or carpet are all perfectly adequate answers.

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Hey could I ask you a question? Yes Thanks

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The original Superman: Cruelty! Do you remember the original superman color movies? Like when he just deflected lasers bombs fire and bullets, he threw busses, spun around the world, was completely immune to anything but kryptonite and then... (pls dont hate) ...Fell of a horse and became a complete cripple?

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Why couldn't the Chinese man drive? Because he didn't have his driver's license yet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops