Q. What do you tell a women with two black eyes? A. Stop pissing him off!

Why can't Helen Keller have sex? She is dead

A raccoon walks into a bar. He then proceded to bite 3 people before animal control got him. A black man, hispanic man and an asian man. Later they all walked to the hospital and were treated for rabies, they were all fine as rabies is normally not fatal when caught early. Moral- this story is racist cause the white man was completely unharmed, DONT DISCRIMINATE!

Ring ring yes.This is doctor steve and we got our test results and it seems that you'r son has butinites and you'r kind sytoms are nothing because he is just an ass.

Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

Three Men walk into a bar. One with a ax and one with a Shovel. The other one isn't holding anything. *Boom* (\ _ /) (x . x)

Racial Equality

What's white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A refrigerator.

A man walks into a bar. He proceeds to get intoxicated and then commits a felony.

David Cameron

I can't remember the punchline for this joke so I recommend you stop reading this...why are you still reading this whats wrong with you!!!!

What is big, green, fuzzy, and would kill you if it fell on you? A pool table.

A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

Why didn't the boomerang return? It hit a baby

Why did the boy play Xbox? Because its a quality source of entertainment

what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

a man died

Man: Did It Hurt Woman: Did what hurt? Man: When your legs were crushed after being run over by that semi

Did you fall on your head when you were a baby Oh, Im very sorry.

Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Ok good, just checking. It would be a shame for your perishable foodstuffs to go bad.

Patients: Whats happening doctor Doctor: I am afraid you all have tested positive Patients: Oh No!!! Doctor: Positive for being great friends all these years! Patients: Oh Doctor you are so.... Doctor: ASWELL AS AIDS!!!

columbus laid an egg. he was very proud of it, but the other dudes ate it.

A horse walked into a bar. The bar was part of the fence he was enclosed by.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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