What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Barack Obama, George W. Bush and Dick Cheney are in a room, what are they doing? A: Breathing

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the boy stop playing nintendo 64? He choked on a red M and M and struggled for air until he fell lifelessly on the floor, landing on his pet mole, furthermore, dying and killing the animal as well. It was loose loose situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Ding Dong! Who's the - - - wait - - - I don't have a doorbell.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom says, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender replies, "Exactly. That's a health hazard. The health department already gave two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call an old widow with 12 cats? Forever alone.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Boy 1: Hey do you want my last chewing gum? Boy 2: Yeah please! Boy 1: Same. The boy continues to eat the chewing gum and finishes his shit wandering why the boy walked into the same cubicle as him.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are purple violets are green I am color blind shut up

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Nickelback

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats the similarity between a rabbit and a grape? There both purple, except for the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a black Santa Claus A N i g g e r that doesn't exist

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man finds a magic lamp and rubs it. A genie appears and says that he will grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish for a duck". POOF! He got a duck. Then he says "I wish for a penguin". POOF! A penguin magically appears. He thought long and hard for his 3rd wish. Then he said "I wish I had a turtle" POOF! Suddenly out of nowhere the genie disappears. The man looked inside the magic lamp and saw a small turtle. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

your face

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing you should be worrying about the future not the past.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did Geoar Bush say after a journalist ask what he was going to do about Katrina? Where gonna find her we do think she has some connection with Alkida .

thumb_up thumb_down -4

"Why did Jim Jones put cyanide in the People's Temple Flavor Aid?" Because he understood that adding sugar would be bad for their teeth.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the difference between a white guy playing basketball and a black guy playing hockey??? There is none..they hardly get playing time!!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats worse than a creep? ..... Paul sweeney!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Jim fell of his bike, wanna know how. Someone threw a car at him. Knock knock, who's there, not Jim

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a black man climbing a mountain. A mountain climber.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops