What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

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Why was the boy in hospital? He fell off the bus and was run over by many cars.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Guess what sucks! A Vaccume. Guess what blows! A Sucky Vaccume.

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the economy.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

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What did they gay chicken say to the straight chicken? .... nothing, chickens dont speek.

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Q: What did the shark say while eating the surfer A: Nothing, his mouth was full, and besides....sharks cannot talk.

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Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

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Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

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What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

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Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had escaped from a KFC slaughterhouse, and proceeded forward to avoid getting caught. However, the chicken did not consider the childhood lectures off his parents about crossing the road safely, and got ran over by a black Golf GTI, and died instantly.

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Q:What's worse than stepping on lego? A:Hiroshima.

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I'm so stupid that I'm posting on Anti Jokes!

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What do you call a person that smells like shite and chases uglier girls than him? .. . . . . . . .. . . . . . Smelly McD the smelly cunt

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Question to make it sound like a racist joke? Politically correct answer that should not offend anyone.

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Why was Helen Keller such a bad driver? Cause she was blind, def, and mute. Thus making it difficult to drive.

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Once their was an ugly barnacle. He was sooooo ugly that everyone died! The end. :D

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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