Your dads so fat he needs to go on a diet

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Why did the boy die of Cancer? Because I took some radioactive chemicals and hen I feel like it I beat him with it.

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Why does the Anti-Joke site suck? Because it's not funny.

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Why was Jimmy so bad at jumping rope? His father's car ran over an IED back in 2009. Jimmy had lost his legs in a tragic explosion.

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What's worse than the holocaust? The Jews.

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What do you do when you go downstairs in the middle of the night and see your VCR floating in the middle of the living room? Run and cower in fear in this seemingly impossible situation.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

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Why did Stephen get an A on his test? He held his teacher at gunpoint and forced her to give him a good grade despite the fact he got an F.

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Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

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I bought a pound of gold for my new gold ring, later that day I lost it

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What happens when u poke a ghost that is standing on the edge of a building? Ghost aren't real so therefor u will fall of the edge and die

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full house should of been called black jack, because the Olsen twins started getting hit on at age 8 and didn't stop til they were 21

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A man walks into a bar. He's black. Its 1962. He is immediately arrested.

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Why did the Jew post a free link on his Facebook wall? Because it is funny and he hoped his friends would like it.

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What do Black people call their fathers? Dad.

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Why is the mexican navy so bad? They have insufficient funds to give to their military as they are a 2nd world country.

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bish bash bosh giz a nosh

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What's long, hard, and black, and goes into wet things? A submarine.

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a black guy a chinese guy a jewish guy and a gay guy are standing on a ledge. they are all ready to jump off and commit suicide. suddenly a basketball falls from the sky. the black guy is like oh shit that my bball. he cant resist, he jumps off the ledge, grabs the ball, spins in mid air, and shoots it through the window that they came out of. then he falls to his death. the other three guys are questioning whether they wanna actually kill themselves when all of a sudden a jiggly dildo flies past. the gay guy sees it, and he needs it in his butthole. he jumps off, grabs the dildo, shoves it in his ass, and falls to his death. the chinese and the jew are the last alive. they decide that they dont want to die and they start crawling back towards the window. then out of nowhere, two quarters and a nickel shoot up from the ground, right in front of them. the jew needs them. he jumps off the ledge and pockets the change. then he falls to his death. the chinese guy is the last one alive. he jumps off and falls to his death.

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when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. when life gives you melons, you are soon diagnosed with dyslexia.

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My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I guess I make a good milkshake.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bike

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I had sex with your mom. It was f*cking terrible.

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What did the Democrat say to the Republican? "I am sorry about your mother". They had been good friends since childhood and the Republicans mother was soon to die from terminal cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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