what do you call an old man missing a toe? a diabetic.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Guy 1: there is this really funny knock knock joke. Ok you start. Guy 2: knock knock Guy 1: who's there Guy 2: umm what? I don't know

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Knock knock. Who's there. Alex. Alex who? Your brother Alex. Oh, please come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's the difference between a baby and an onion? I cry when I chop up an onion.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats the difference between a black guy and a pizza? A black guy is a human being, and a pizza is a food you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Paper or plastic? Yes...

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's brown and sticky? Molasses.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What did the black man say to the asian? Hey.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Who lives on 2324 Elm St. River Grove Illinois? And Goes to East Leyden High School? The answer is Ricky Krajewski. He is 16 years old has brown hair and brown eyes. 5'11" 190lbs and 6.5 inch penis(when erect). social security # is 679-78-6283.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

PIED NINNY!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Where did the Smith family spend their weekend together? At the father's funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

There were once three bears who lived in a cottage in the forest. They left to go to the market one day. While they were gone a blonde girl walked into their cabin. Meanwhile at the market, everyone was freaking out that there were bears there.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Women don't need an education. The only book they need is a recipe book.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you make a girl happy then sad within 5 seconds? Buy her a pony and then shoot it

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the fish cross the road? Because the chicken was carrying an aquarium.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Your momma is so dumb, that when she took the IQ test her scores were considerably lower then average.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What is brown and lives in a toilet? A black homeless man

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a light bulb Why? Because they're so darn stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Jellybeans

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops