what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?............Gangrape

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What's worse than finding out your husbands gay...........finding out he's gay with your brother"

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i used to think i had the coolest secret handshake with helen keller. then i realized she was talking sh*t about me

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your family is so poor that you require healthcare to recieve money

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whats the differnce between a corvette and a pile of dead babies??? i dont have a corvette in my garage.

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person 1: i have a good knock knock joke person 2: ok what is it? person 1: say knock knock! person 2: knock knock person 1: trollollollollollollo

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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What do you call a man with no body, just a nose? Nobody Knows.

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what did batman say to robyn before he got in the car?... "get in the car"

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. Yes dyslexic people drink too.

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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Yo momma is so fat that you should really take her to the hospital, i've become very concerned for her.

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How do you stop someone from dying of cancer? Shoot them in the head.

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Knock knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Orange Orange who? Banana Banana who? I have AIDS

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whats brown and sticky? whatever is coming from your pants

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

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Why black guys are the fasttest runners? Because the slowers are already in prison

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Why did the autistic man cross the road? He was also depressed. It was a highway.

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How do you confuse a Mexican? Stand in the middle of a crosswalk while shouting "Cthulu will rise!" whilst looking at the sky and playing "Everybody Have Fun Tonight" by Wang Chung. Works every time.

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You're so ugly you got rejected from the zoo.

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Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -.......

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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