Two men are sitting in a pub. One man turns to the other and says: 'Last night I saw lots of strange men coming in and out of your wife's house.' The other man replies: 'Yes, she has become a prostitute to subsidize her drug habit.'

Roses are read Vilots are blue, I have a gun, Now get out of my house!!!

No soap radio

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

A Priest a Rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The rest of the patrons continue to drink until the situation seems less strange.

what does lady gaga and a vacuum have in common? nothing. lady gaga is a human and the other is a house hold item.

A African man and Hispanic man fall off of a cliff, which hits the ground first? They both hit the ground simultaneously, due to their equal mass and surface area.

Did you hear the one about the nascar driver who couldn't pass his road test? No. It's true, he couldn't pass his road test.

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? Neither have i

What did the mormon say when he complemented the gay person? Nothing, because mormons hate gays.

A duck walks into a bar, the bartender asks "What'd you want?" the duck responds "A miller lite please" promptly after that the bartender was tested for mental insanity because he thinks ducks can talk.

A man walks into a man walks into a man walks into a man.

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

I just read the long joke posted earlier. I have no life. :(

Twenty-Four

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says, "Boy, it sure is hot in here!" The other muffin says nothing because it is a muffin.

A Muslim walks out of a bar... Because he doesn't drink alcohol

What begins with "N" and ends with "R" that you never want to call a black person? Your neighbor

What's big, brown, and full of crap? A septic tank.

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It got shot. Why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first one. Why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree? It thought it was a race to the bottom? Why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree? No one knows, not even the guy who made this joke.

Your face

Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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