how do you kill a blonde? the way you would kill anyone, here are some examples gun knife noose or orange. wait wtf who kills someone with an orange

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Out of all the sadness and death in the world...do you know what the worst part is? Mexicans are still hoping the border...

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Q: why id the bird fly away from the boy? A: cuz he was scared

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"33"

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A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in the front of his pants. He is given some very strange looks from the patrons both due to the fact that he has a steering wheel in his pants and because people wearing traditional pirate garb are a rarity.

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This is the concept of anti-joke.

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why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a date-rapist

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Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

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your mamas so fat all she gets for christmas and her birthday is girdles!

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I nicknamed my diick "the truth" because the biitches can't handle it

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Wanna hear a funny joke? I can't think of one at the moment...

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Badgers are cool

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What did 7 say to 6? I hear you've been spreading stories about me.

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What did the bear say to the mouse? Roar.

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what do you call a starfish living 500 miles under the sea? A starfish.

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yo mamma's so fat, she decided to go on a diet

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Q: What's white, black, and red all over? A: The yellow brick road

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drake

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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What's green and has wheels? Boogers on a skateboard.

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What did the man do after he rented a movie? He watched it

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Whay is jerry so bad at parallel parking? He just got a sex change yesterday.

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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A priest walks past a mailbox with the number 666 on it. Nothing happens, because it is an ordinary mailbox.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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