I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

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knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

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You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

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So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being disabled.

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Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

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Why were the floors of the movie theaters so sticky? Spilled beverages.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Fags are gay.

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What do you call a black man selling drugs? average

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights

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A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

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An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

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knock knock who's there? bell bell who? bellend

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why do bananas wear sunscreen? becuase they peel!

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Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

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In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

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whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

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How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

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Yo mama is so fat!

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What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What did the boy get for creating a fantastic AntiJoke? Leukemia

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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