What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Nicholas Salek did not write the message below. It was a joke one of his mates played!!

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Your mother is so fat when she jumps she comes backs down.

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What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

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What did one pile of dirt say to the other pile of dirt?? You're dirty

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Why did the Jew wear a beanie while playing soccer? Because he shaved his head

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Im going to the patriots jets game this year..... When the kick a feild goal and you see two kids wearing lime green holding up a poster that says BRADY LIKES SAGGY BALLS that will be me and my friend -RT

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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"I can sell this watch for $500 dollars on the black market!" Well, you could sell your liver for $500 dollars on the black market too.

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i used to be gay. now i am bisexual.

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How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

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Why did the lightbulb go out? It was on too long

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your mom is like a lowling ball, she likes to be fingered then thrown back into the gutter

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Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

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Who's Italian and plays with a peach? Mario

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms.

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How many women's right's leaders does it take to change a light bulb? None. They can't change anything.

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John Stamos.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Why, apples are the optimum environment for the worm species, offering a stable temperature with the efficiency of nutrition and comortable value, therefore in reality finding a worm in your apple is a healthy suggestion that the Global Warming effects on Earth have not yet affected the ever increasing innocent worm population.

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what did the left nut say to the right nut? The guy above us is a real dick huh?

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What is the difference between a rat and an italian? nothing.

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If a vegetarian only eats vegetables, then what does a humanitarian eat?

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Why did annie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms! Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Annie!

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what do you call a 19th century steam train driver ? i dont know , depends what his mother named him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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