Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face

How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? depends on how thin you can slice them.

what did the man say when he walked into the bar? ouch!

Yeah, and speaking about spiderman, I got some weird senses, when I get stressed things begin seeming slower, and gets a weird blur effect, not sure what it is, but if you know what "bullet hell video games are" Technically games where you play as a tiny spaceship and lots of bullets fly around, I was always awesome at those games as a kid, because the more stress I felt while playing, the slower my perception of time felt.

why did matt daly shit his pants? he had downs

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

What's black and hangs from tree's? A suicidal black man.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

Why was the man crying? Because he was punched in the stomach.

That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

Two tigers, walking down Oxford St. One turns to the other & says, "Quiet for a Saturday, don't you think?"

Two unemployed Irishmen are out looking for work when they pass a lumberyard. There's a sign outside that said "Tree Fellers Wanted". Sean turns to Patrick and says " What a curious way to write that sign. Surely the term is lumberjack?" "Yes," says Patrick "but what with the current economic situation here in Ireland, I say we get in there, apply for the jobs and hope that our lack of experience is overlooked." "Okay." Says Sean. "And let's not mention the whole sign thing." "No."

Q) why did jimmy kick the bucket. A) Because his dad is an alcoholic and Beats him to the point of near death, so He takes his anger out by kicking anatomit Objects such as a bucket.

What's worse than a snake in your boot. A boot in your snake.

cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer

What has two leg, but cant walk? A paraplegic.

Why did Hitler kill himself? Cause he couldn't afford to pay the gas bill.

A fat lady walks into a bar. Your probably wondering what she ordered. She ordered a ham burger.

Yo Mama So Fat ... She Look Like Dis ///(*<>*)\\\ | | | | <=> <=>

Bake until golden at 375

Did you hear about the eskimo and the pregnant lady? The eskimo got the pregnant lady pregnant.

Erectile Dysfunction.

Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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