What was the last thing the clown said to his wife before she died? Rebecca, just stay with me, the ambulance is almost here.

What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. Unless it's muscular dystrophy.

What does a paralysed mans legs feel like? We don't know, he is paralysed

A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

Why is Kony hated by the kid with ADHD? Hey look a kid being raped while watching his family getting killed.

What's worse than waking up next to an ugly girl? Waking up, sealed in a coffin which is floating on a raft traversing through shark-infested waters. Oh, and the raft is on fire.

Knock, knock. Whose there? Tits. Tits, who? SUCK EM'!

What do you call a guy who can't get a girlfriend? Me.

Chinese, Japanese, dirty knees - have nothing at all in common.

What's yellow and highly dangerous? Shark-infested banana pudding.

Nobody enjoys your company. Nobody likes your work. Nobody loves you. There is no person who's name is legitimately nobody.

What's worse than a 15 year old getting hit by a car? Adam Johnson

women's rights.

When Nicki Minaj wrote her song "Stupid Hoe" she was sublimminally talking about her self.

Their, they're, there You're, your

Yo Mama so slow She can't run very fast.

Carlos was attempting to write anti-jokes. He sucks at writing anti-jokes.

knock knock ... no one was in

What got stolen from the poor boys house... Nothing, he was so poor that he couldn't even afford any thing

your mom is so old. she can legally get a senior discount

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick!

WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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