Q: What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? A: They both have handlebars except for the duck!

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why did the plane crash? because fenton was driving it..."THE DEER HAD TO DIE"

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Random question: Whats black and white, green, and black and white? Well thought out correct answer: 2 zebras fighting over a pickle

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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A black guy walks into a bar. He falls unconscious and an ambulance is quickly called to bring him to the hospital.

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Now this is a story all about how, my life got flipped, turned upside down. Now I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there, and I'll tell you how I lost my job at the tire plant, and how, being out of work and unable to find a new job, I was unable to pay my mortgage. The bank repossessed my house, my wife left me and took custody of the kids, and I ended up having to sell all my remaining possessions and move to a new city in order to try and find employment.

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Whats brown and sticky? Brown glue

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"Do you live in the United States?", said the man. "no." said the other man, "cool beans", said the woman.

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Why does batman wear a mask? Because if he didn't every enemy would know who he was, go to his house a brutally murder him.

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In the movie Dark Skies, little white boys were haunted by a mysterious force. The answer is obvious, isn't it? They are being haunted by Michael Jackson's ghost.

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How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Trick question they cant afford one.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobel Nobel who? There was no bell, that's why I'm knocking you idiot

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What has a head but can't see? A penis.

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Why does a black man have a bicycle? He bought it with his own money.

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What'f funny and has 8 wheels? The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels

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your mum

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How do you trap a squirrel? You carefully set up a trap and place acorns in the trap.

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What's the difference between Jew and a bread? Bread does not scream when you put him in oven.

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Why didn't peyton manning's grand mom call him after his game? She died of throat cancer 5 years ago

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Why did the Jewish man dive into the street to pick up a penny? He was Tevye, a character from the famous play Fiddler on the Roof and pennies are valuable and rare in Tsarist Russia in 1905.

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your momma is so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Polity ask him to stop.

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(Put joke here)

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Biggest lie ever; "I have read and agree to the terms of service".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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