What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They have a lengthy discussion regarding the hardships their people have suffered throughout history. Eventually, the subject changes to which coffee franchise has the best blend. A clear, concise decision is never reached. They then are asked to leave the bar, as they have not ordered any drinks and the bar is for paying customers only.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Spanish Inquisition.

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What do you call a woman with a black eye and several cuts on her face? The police and perhaps a social help hotline. She now feels safer and more secure and will go on to lead a happy life thanks to you speaking out on her behalf.

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A black man walks into a bar and says, "ouch."

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How do you kill a retard You give em a kinfe and ask who's special

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you thro them

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Why didn't the Irishman want to drink anymore? Because he wasn't thirsty.

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Why did the man spill his coffee on his daughter? Because he is dying from Mad Cow disease so his hand experienced a traumatic spasm.

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Membean

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What do you call a qoman with 10 kids? A mother with 10 kids

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Why did Margret eat the banana? She was hungry.

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What's the difference between a horse? All legs are of equal length, especially the left one.

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Why do you put a baby in a blender face up? To see the expression on its face

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Q: what did one kangaroo say too the other kangaroo? A: I was told I am schizophrenic.

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When is your birthday? November 13 what year? every year

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What did Frankenstein say to Dracula? Hey, that's a nice cape.

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This is the worst anti-joke on the entire site. Just look at all the thumbs down!

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Youre in your car, and you stop at a light you see a home less person holding a sign that says "Home less and hungry, anything helps." You ask if they want a box of cereal, "No thanks." They replied, you ask why not? "Well, I really just want to go to the movies."

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What is red and itchy? Something that itches and it turns red if you itch it to much

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A cow says moo and explodes.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Becasue she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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its was amazinglysmooth fuck off

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I'm a raging homosexual.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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