Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did Little Timmy fall off of his bike? Because he was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator. Knock knock Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

Why was a group of children being driven away by a black man? Michael was the students bus driver, he was taking them to the zoo.

Hey I just met you, and this is Crazy, but I think I Love You, so have my baby! ;)

what do you call a white guy on a bus load of blacks guys? probably his name...

jay hefti is so cool and alex askew is hot

Why did Paul Walker cross the road? He wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

--Knock Knock Who's there? --Banana Banana who? --Knock Knock You just said that --Sorry i have Alzheimer's

"KNOCK KNOCK". I opened the door to greet my guests for the party.

if dave has 50 candy bars and eats 45 what does he have? diabeties.

Dogs in my home.

What's black and red and can go through time. I don't know but you have cancer and are going to die very soon.

Why did they bury the pope on the side of the hill? Because he is dead

Thumbs this down

Hey i just met u And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey i just met u

A person expresses their opinion online. Another person thanks them for sharing their opinion but kindly disagrees, then he wishes the other person to have a good day.

If your uncle helped you off An horse, would you help your uncle jack off an horse?

What's brown and sticky? Fecal matter.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H20" and the second one says, "I'll have some H20 too." The second scientist dies after drinking hydrogen peroxide.

what's 2 + 2? i don't know that's why i'm asking you

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m-BD0nWgoIw

What black and white and red all over? A panther I was lying about the red and white.

What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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