why did the lady fall on the ground? The cord for the parachute was cut by her husband

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Q: Why is my friend gay? A: Because i slept with him.

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Why did the women call 911 on her 12 year old son? Because he was schizophrenic and attempting to commit suicide by hanging himself.

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antonio is ssooo shexy and smokes

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You're so ugly you got rejected from the zoo.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy! But iI'm on bath salts and your face looks tasty!

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What do you call a guy with no hands working in a hat store? larry

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how do you beat up 3 year old with ease? you beat her up, 3 years can't fight for shit.

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What was jesus's first miracle? He made a blind man walk. And for the stupid people out there jesus's first supposed miracle was making a cripple Walk

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What do you call a black person with dandruff.... A lamington

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why did the moose cross the road? to eat the baby.

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But one McDonalds Happy Meal for the price of two, and receive another McDonalds Happy meal absolutley free!

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69

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Why does the gay person where a leather motorcycle suit? Because he drives motorcycles.

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Remember when they called online casino`s betting sport? Anti Joke potential detected. I used to play soccer and box back then, but I guess I was still not "sporty" enough for betting sports... And as thus I afforded my lawyer education. Moral: Now that you know my education, do you really think id ever type real morals here? Mwahahahaha!

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Why did the little kid fall off the rollercoaster? His dad threw him off.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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roses are red, violets are red, a girl had her period in my garden.

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whats the difference between a flamingo ? because the pyramid has a high cholesterol

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? I like Pie. I like Pie who? What do you mean who? Pie isn't a person, it's a thing.

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Why did the blind kid hit the other kid in the face? He was trying to give him a high-five.

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How do you you know when you haven't slept in a while? You're tired.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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What do you call a dumb blonde with no hair? You don't, since there is no way of knowing that she is blonde.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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