I once had my heart broken by my first true love. I then died, she was convicted of murder and my family grieved over my death.

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A. Do you know what they call Bing Crosby in Sweden? B. No. A. Bing Crosby.

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How did little Timmy die? He was ripped to shreds by a violent badger.

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womens rights

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If you are riding on a broomstick and it breaks in the middle of the ocean... How many pieces of toast does it take to fill a light house? Purple, because Oranges cannot fly.

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The other day I saw this dog. It said woof.

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What did the 5 cent store clerk say to the customer? That will be 5 cents.

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your momma is so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes

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whats black and white and slides on its belly a penguin

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What do you call a person that is green, wearing plaid, and standing next to you in the elevator? What ever their name is

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? A pair of broken sunglasses, because his parents didn't care about him, and because he lived in Hawaii where it is very hot in December. Plus the kid's blind. By Nikhil Sridhar of Taikoo Shing, Hong Kong.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Why did the boy cry? Because his mother died of a heart attack.

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What is the difference between a bucket of shit and a Jew? The Bucket.

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What do you call a snail driving a boat? An accident waiting to happen.

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you ever hear the joke about the rabbi, the pope and an elephant? No? well its a good one...

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Q: What weighs 6 ounces, is extremely dangerous, and lives in a tree? A: A sparrow with a machine gun.

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Wy did the chicken?

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What happened to the clown that touched the kid? The clown got honked up

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How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her in the head.

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what's the black mans shirt made out of? cotton

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You're so ugly you got rejected from the zoo.

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Why did the women call 911 on her 12 year old son? Because he was schizophrenic and attempting to commit suicide by hanging himself.

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antonio is ssooo shexy and smokes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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