Why did the cashier let the jockey off 10 cents? because he was short 10 cents

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What's white and sticky? A glue stick.

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So a man walks into a bar, He says, "Hey bartender! Can I have some beer?" The bartender says, "Sure!" and hands the man a Bud Light. The man drinks the Bud Light and leaves afterward.

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Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocaust.

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A large man goes into a restaurant and places his order The waiter asks if he would like the weight watchers menu He says no because he doesnt care about his weight

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How do you fit 3 squirtles two bulbasors and a charmander in a smart car You poke em on

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How did the black kid drop out of highschool? He got bad grades.

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Why did the little girl stop going to dance class? She broke both of her legs in a terrible train accident

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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sally was hit by a bus and lost both arms knock knock who's there? not sally

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"What happened to John after he got drunk 12 years ago"- police "I don't really don't know that question"- John Jr.

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what did johnny's mom do for his 50th birthday? she died

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Why can't Jimmy walk ever again? Because when he was 12 his father mistook him for a plank of wood a sawed his legs off. We may realise here that this prohibits him from walking.

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How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

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What has feet but cannot walk? What has a beak but cannot peck? What has wings but cannot fly? A dead bird.

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Why did the asian fall over? He had a heart attack.

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Where do you go when your friends called you spoiled? Africa.

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YOUIR MAMA IS SO UGLY THAT SHE MIGHT WANT TO LOOK INTO PLASTIC SURGERY TO BETTER HER APPEARENCE

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Q. You know what sucks A. Being an orphan

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There's a plane with 5000 bricks in it, one falls out. How many bricks are on the plane now? 4999 How do you get an elephant in the fridge? U open the fridge,put the elephant in and close the fridge. How do you get a deer in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out and close the fridge. A lion is trowing a party and the whole animal kingdom shows up, what animal isn't there? The deer cause he's still in the fridge. A little old lady is walking threw an alligator and snake invested swamp. *The snakes and alligators eat her (wrong answer) The brick falls on her head

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Are you gay? No. Ok.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your moms face is turning purple. I'm coming for you.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Tell her to inform the police that her significant other is assaulting them and that she should file a restraining order.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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