A woodchuck could chuck wood but a woodchuck couldn't chuck Norris because Norris isn't a type of wood.

what do all 21 year olds have in common? there all 21

What's blue and says "Good morning" A blue sign that says good morning

How can you tell if your goldfish is male or female? Put some fishfood in the bowl, if he swims to the food it's a male, if she swims to the food it's a female.

How do you drown a blond? Keep her head underwater until her lungs fill with water and her bodily functions stop working.

Pinus Testicles

Q: What do you call a black hitchhiker? A: A hitchhiker

Q: What's worse than a dead baby? A: A dead baby with diarrhea.

I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash and the other one is a watermelon.

A family's house was possessed by ghosts causing them great fear and discomfort. Who are they gonna call? A real estate agent.

What did the blonde say to the man when he asked her what time it was? 6:34 pm

A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and therefore could not see well without the help of glasses.

A man with a ski mask leaves a jewelry store He then goes back because he accidentally took the clerk's pen

What's the difference between a jazz musician and a cheese pizza? A cheese pizza is a food and a jazz musician is a person.

What is large, white, and can't climb trees? A refrigerator.

How do you make a sandwich? You don't, you have a girl do it for you.

Yeah, I never intended to keep that a secret. What is autocast?

Your mom is so fat, she suffers from heart disease, high blood pressure, and type 2 diabetes.

Where did Little Billy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

A blind 1st grader is doing math. He can't figure out a problem so he asks his mom to help, his mom then ask "Why don't you just count by your fingers?" the little boy then said "MOM! I'm blind I can't see!" his mom replys "then how do you see your homework?" the boys replys "I opened my eyes, now help me"

What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

How could the teacher tell that the student was dead? logic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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