Q: Why do so many people write "So a man walked into a bar" A: Because they lack the intellect to think of something creative, and still other peoples material.

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Why aren't elephants allowed in public pools? Because they are elephants.

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Are you from Tenessee? I heard you were from there

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The other day I saw this dog. It said woof.

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Why did the little girl stop going to dance class? She broke both of her legs in a terrible train accident

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How did the polar bear get the bottle of coke? He killed the little boy

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Are you gay? No. Ok.

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Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

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Why'd the girl fall of her scooter? She fell into a hole and died. She was never found again. All that was left was her scooter.

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Bob: You need to push harder? Tom: Oh wow what a coincidence, that is what my wife said last night. They laugh about the irony of the situation and then return to the task at hand

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four nazis are walking towards this jew. as soon as the first nazi came in arms reach of the jew he and his friends started to maliciously hug the jew.......................................and then 20 years later they killed his family.

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What is pink, female and has two dicks? A mother with two sons, both called Richard.

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What do the words lightbulb and lightweight have in common? The word light is in both words. Other than that absolutely nothing.

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There's a plane with 5000 bricks in it, one falls out. How many bricks are on the plane now? 4999 How do you get an elephant in the fridge? U open the fridge,put the elephant in and close the fridge. How do you get a deer in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out and close the fridge. A lion is trowing a party and the whole animal kingdom shows up, what animal isn't there? The deer cause he's still in the fridge. A little old lady is walking threw an alligator and snake invested swamp. *The snakes and alligators eat her (wrong answer) The brick falls on her head

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? lettuce lettuce who? Lett-uce be friends

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What's red and smells like a rose? Bumble-bees licking honey off of a stick.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? A: A dog

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Q: Do you know what really makes me smile? A: Facial Muscles.

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Whats the difference between Lady Gaga and Justin Bieber? Lady Gaga has a penis.

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Why did the boy want to commit suicide? Because he didn't want to die.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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What happened when the boys visited Penn State? They got toured around campus and decided that it would be their future college.

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why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gate open and chickens typically wonder with no obvious pattern to their movements.

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Chuck Norris is an average human being!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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