Who could be happier than a kid at a candyshop? A necrophiliac in a morgue

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Come out with your hands up.

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What starts with P and ends in ORN? Porn.

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Two blondes were driving down the road. The blonde driving looks at her friend in the passenger seat and asks her to see if her blinker is working. So the blonde looks out the window and says, ''Yes. No. Yes. No.''

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

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How many unicorns does it take to change a light bulb? 17. 11 if its Tuesday.

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What is blue and looks like a bucket? A blue bucket

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.

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Three guys went barhopping. One slipped and broke his dick.

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The Christian prayed every night to God for a new bike. He kept it up for a year. Finally, he got a bike for his birthday.

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How many 1 ft dwarfs does it take to climb up a 55 ft ladder? Only one. It's just a ladder. All you gotta do is climb up it.

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So there are three black people on a plane. The pilot comes over the intercom and says "Wow wow wow wait a second... ...why are there only three people on this plane? This is a commercial flight"

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's. Alzheimer's who? Knock knock!

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roses are red viloits are blue Bernard is hot but then i led to you

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am disabled, so please help me poo.

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A Mexican, an Italian and an American all walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have pleasant conversation, and all return home to loving families safely and securely.

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no, ten dead babies nailed to ten dead babies.

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Why couldn't the blonde bride make it to her own wedding? She had another unplanned circumstance occur and the wedding was postponed until next week.

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Why was the boy sad? He had just been in a terrible car accident in which he witnessed his entire family die painful, violent deaths and thus suffered from survivor's guilt. Also he dropped his ice cream.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Wanna go bike riding?

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What do you call a flying jew? Smoke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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