When life gives you lemons, You find a new life

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What do you call a man looking at Anti jokes on this ? you

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A man walks up to a horse and asks, "why the long face?" The horse stares back at him, blankly. The man then sits and ponders his life, sad that he now tries to communicate with horses and realizes that his eccentricity is probably the reason his marriage failed.

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what did the asain have for dinner? A: rice

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One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

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whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket in disguise

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m-BD0nWgoIw

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Q: what animal didnt get on Noah's ark in pairs? A: worms. they got on in apples.

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Knock knock? Who's there? A Jehovah's Witness. Oh. Knock knock? Who's there? Not me!

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A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

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your mom is so old, she is often confused for your grandmother.

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Your mama's so fat.

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Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? The Batmobile only seats one, you'll have to take the bike Boy Wonder.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! Who's there?! ... Ditched again!

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot for Arabian Air, idiot. What were you thinking?

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Give me thumbs up!

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There are two muffins in an oven. One says nothing. Muffins can't talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ....Because based on modern mathematics the shortest distance between two points is a straight line.

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A minor, her mom, her aunt and a marine went out drinking...they had a fun night

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A Jewish man died in a car crash. His family mourned his death throughout the next few years.

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why was the boy laying on the ground? he got shot in the head

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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