Whats the easiest way to kill a blonde? Shoot her

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you are a åsshole :)

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A short Irish man and a tall German man went skydiving. Both parachutes coincidentally failed to deploy and they died.

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How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? No amount of them could ever figure it out. They all tremble with fear in the dark.

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Whats the differance between a blond and a rock? I don't know. I can't think of any.

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WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

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what did the crippled boy say to the truck driver? "i like cats."

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A man with a white bed sheet on his body and head grimaced at a black man. He said to the black man, can you help me with my ghost costume? Something in the back is poking me and it hurts.

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What did the Dinosaur say to the Seal? Dinosaur's cant.. wait...

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What did the house do when it came alive? It went home

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Whats worse than a little kid falling. Him getting vigorously raped by his father every night.

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Why did the mushroom get invited to the party? He is a fun-gi!!

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What is the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family

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Q: What's blue and fuzzy A: Blue fuzz

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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roses are scarce, violets are farse, come over here and i'll stick it up ya ar#e.

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what makes reed stop talking? LYRENS SHARPENED PENCIL

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bike? A: Someone threw a refridgerator at his head.

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A blond walks into McDonalds. She orders and leaves.

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Kony 2012 - Uganda Be Kidding Me

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Why did the fridge fall off its bike? Because someone threw a little girl at it.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

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what do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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