- Anti Joke

Miranda Cosgrove's singing career. ......Thats it. Thats the joke.

HEy Hey Hey! Lakers are so going to bounce back!

Printing billions of counterfeit dollars...in ones.

This is a haiku I said this is a haiku You read a haiku

What does a pelican and a taxman have in common? Both are bipedal, both are carbon-based lifeforms that procreate by DNA replication, both in all probablility eat fish, both have survival instinct, both require fresh water for hydration, both have five senses; vision, hearing, touch, taste and smell, both are capable of at least limited cognition, and both can turn aggressive when provoked.

Yo momma so fat, she died.

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

What do you get when you mix a dog with a pool table? I don't know.

What white and black and red all over? The wife who refused to report that her husband abused her.

Knock knock? Who's there? Llama. Llama who? Llamas aren't racist unlike that bastard Ann Coulter. That's why they can get a carrot up the ass and she can't.

A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. They both start to pee, and the white man looks over to the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the blackman's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels embaraased at his latent homosexuality. They both leave, never seeing eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

When life gives you lemons, find someone with a papercut.

Guy 1: I had a Energy Drink the other day, I crashed. Guy 2: Really? That must of sucked. Guy 1: Yeah, the family in the other car died.

Q. You know what sucks A. Being an orphan

Sticks and stones may break my bones... and my pistol will kill you.

Yeah sure, you have "absolutely... ...No... ...Reason..." to... Fucking... use... This... place... at... all... But you seem to be here all the fucking time, what fucking sense does that make? That is not the matter at all fagface! Your fucking goons assaulting me because "I stole one of your aliases?" I was born Nero and will die fucking Nero, not Nerometal, not Nero of Neronism, just Nero your friendly rapist! Yeah Ill give you my fucking social info, so you... and... your... excessive... use... of... this shit... can... send... your ...fucking assholes to finish the job! Listen bitch! I am a writer! And your faggots stabbed off like half of my eyeball! I don't give a damn about this site, I want your fucking assholes to stop seeking me out in person! Hell, give me your social info, so we can "make a fucking settlement" Where I break off your head and shit down your neck!

A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

A man is about to rape a girl. Before penetration he carefully and correctly applies a condom as he practices safe sex and is not yet ready to father a child.

An apple a day keeps a check next to the "I ate an apple today" box on my "what I did today" daily checklist.

DIY LOLOBJECTIFACEPASSED OUT PHOTOSRATE MY EX GIRLFRIENDREPUBLICAN EQUALSSCUMBAG STEVE CHECK OUT OUR IPHONE APP! POPULAR NEWEST RANDOM WRITE YOUR OWN! Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below! Your Answer I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service Anti Joke What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. The Anti Joke Book NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we’ve resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book! MOAR?? Want more? You might be interested in… Anti-Joke Chicken Anti-Joke Triceratops Download Our Free App! Hay guise, our iPhone app was just approved! Pictures From Our Other Sites OBJECTIFACE SHIT BRIX JAPAN IS WEIRD SPOILED PHOTOS RATE MY BATTLESTATION TATTOO FAILURE Quotes From Other Sites “Guy: Have you ever seen a rhinoceros? Girl:No. Why? Guy: So you don't have a mirror in your house?.” via: Anti-Pickup Line “On the GT (Between Hammond and Clarkson) Hammond: So with that, the Ford GT gets 75 miles per tank. Jeremy, how far is it to....” via: Clarksonisms “Flavorless jelly beans...” via: Pointless Inventions “the power to glow fainlty in broad daylight.” via: Pointless Super Powers “When I see a post on this site with a single downvote I start to feel guilty and give the person an upvote because I....” via: Things You Think Only You Do “Why did the blonde drown in the pool? Because a person tied an anvil to her leg and dropped it in the deep end of....” via: ethugtxt Anti-Pickup LineClarksonismsethugtxtPointless InventionsPointless Super Powers Feedback :: Advertising Inquiries :: Copyright :: Privacy :: Terms of Service ©2008-2011 Anti Joke. All rights reserved. A Horse Head Huffer Production. Rails Hosting provided by BlueBox

Why can't John hear what Muhammad says? John is deaf.

knock knock!! kanye west

What do you call a fat indian boy Eeeeeeeh fatty boy

My friend harris is fat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops