GONNA

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was michael jackson black or white? how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie poop? the world will never know

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What's brown and sticky? The faeces of a glue stick.

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roses are red violets are blue im in class

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What happens when a rabbit is late for a very important date? Nothing, rabbits have no logical way to keep track of time.

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why was the guy stranded on an island? because his boat crashed.

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If your uncle helped you off An horse, would you help your uncle jack off an horse?

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What's big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? Your mom.

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Obama: And then I said there would be a change. (hahahahahaha)

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What's blue and pillowy? A blue pillow

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What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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Teacher: "What is the outside layer on a tree?" Dog: "Bark" Teacher: "How would you describe the desert surface?" Dog: "Rough" Teacher: "Would you say that Abraham Lincoln was an intelligent man?" Dog: "Yarp"

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What is funny and has three legs? Not the Holocaust.

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when i start seeing A TON of black people what does that mean? im color blind

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what do you get when you cross do you get when you cross a banana and a monkey? one happy monkey

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Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

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How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

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A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

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What's green and blue that is shaped like the earth? The earth

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What is the difference between a duck. One of its legs are both the same.

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Why did Alice fail Maths? Because everybody else was Asian.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face", the horse said nothing; because it is a horse.

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Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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A Priest, A Pedofile, and a Rapist walk into a bar. He Orders A Drink

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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