What do giant panda bears eat? giant bamboo

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

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If you like this song so much why don't you marry it? Because a divorce would be tough on the kids

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Did you know that if you stacked enough elephants to reach from the earth to the moon, all those elephants would die?

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What did the black person say to the tall man with nice shoes? Nice shoes.

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Why did the chicken lay an egg? Because she got knocked up.

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Womens' Rights

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Whats worse than not coming up with an original anti joke? Nothing.

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What does a gay horse eat? HEEEEEEYYYYYY!

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Knock knock Who's there? Doorbell repairman

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uh uh uh uh .... oh i swallowed my gum

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ati jokes are not to be funny. what about u

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What's black and red and can go through time. I don't know but you have cancer and are going to die very soon.

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What did the one bagpiper say to the other? Nothing, one cannot speak while playing the bagpipes.

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it depressed me to be diagnosed with depression

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Knock, Knock Who's there ? So So who? No, So Lee

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8================================================================================================D-------------------------------------------- It can coil!

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One day, John ate some food. He quickly realized he had an upsetting feeling in his stomach, so he stopped eating food and used the restroom. Then he drew a picture.

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i put the STD in S.T.u.D all i need is U!!! F_CK all i need is U!!!!!!! o.0 lolzzz

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what's worse than getting raped the guy who raped you has aids

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Why did you insult me and then punch me in the face? The hell if you care anymore, I killed you straight after. Neo-Nero. (Rest in peace Nero7 better known as The Moral Man, I hope I can one day live up to your greatness.) Moral: "Keep your spirits up, we are all going to die sometime, but life means nothing if we lose faith in ourselves and each other" Moral 2: "Nero Septimus, that will be my first and last moral that made a figment of fucking sense, if you are watching from whatever comes from life, I know that this is what you would have done, but just so you know and always wanted for us that followed you, I am doing this for my own goddamn fucking self, respects... Now if your ghost is still watching, get the fuck out of my room you damn cripple, and know that your arm is somewhere in the basement because its so goddamn bad ass that it fucking freaks me out, and so fucking heavy that I think you where some sort of superhuman, now gtfo, as you taught us, we cant focus on the goddamn afterlife, if we are gonna get the best out of life and the present, adios amigo"

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What did one baby say to the other? Nothing, they're both dead.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? You hit it in the face with an axe.

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One. This task does not require over 1 person to complete.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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