Halts Maul Reid. Das ist, was ich rede.

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Roses are Red Violets are plucked So are my nose-hairs Pretty disgusting

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Daniel Textor can suck a gooch he's such a F - A - GGGGG!! Let's beat him up at lunch.

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A homosexual walks into a church

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Knock Knock It's the police, im afraid your wife has been killed in a horrible car accident.

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knock knock who's there? It's Jim we haven't seen each other since college Why hello there come on in

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What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

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your mother hates you

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Women.

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You know how to torture Hellen Keller? -No. Put a plunger in the toilet.

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Knock, Knock Come in

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Roses are red. Violets are red. My thumb is red because I accidentally put it in the toaster.

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Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A. One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a highly trained professional skilled in the art of litigation.

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Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

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There is a cat with a collar animal control takes of the coller and and says who cares it's not Our fault there cat is an outdoor cat the girl who lost her cat was crying all year long spending all her money wishing for her cat back and wishing that there was no such thing as animal control That girl was me and I'm against animal control

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on a stool? Ask them kindly to do so. Their sexual orientation is of little to no importance in this situation.

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An 8 year old, a 9 year old, and jerry sandusky walk into a shower...

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Is every Voltorb a terrorist?

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BenWuzHear

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Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? Ones fun to jump on, the others just a trampoline.

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What did the white doctor say to the black doctor? We both went to medical school.

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what do you call a starfish living 500 miles under the sea? A starfish.

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"I have some good news and some bad news, which do you want to hear first?" The good news. "There is no bad news." Then what's the bad news? "There is no bad news.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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