What did the officer say to the black man? You're under arrest.

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What's the difference between a pen and a tiger? Believe it or not they are both not a cantaloupe.

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What word is ten letters long and starts with gas? Gastronomy.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said, who's there? KNOCK KNOCK OH MY GOD, WHO IS IT??? Yes, we have your daughter here, she was caught doing drugs on school property.

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So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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Why do women wear perfume and makeup? Because they smell bad and are ugly.

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what do you get when you cross an African with a Rhinoceros? A rhinoceros.

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What did the T-rex say to the elephant? i like bananas

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Black Friday

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What kind of cheese doEs god like? Swiss cheese because it's holy!

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What did the cat say to the dog? Nothing, animals are in capable of formal cumunication.

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I made a sandwich Lol jk, my gf made it for me

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Fitzsimmons. We met at your wife's work party.

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Two blondes get in a taxi. Who's driving? The taxi driver.

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A black guy walks into his bar. So he pays his tab and couldn't have been more coureious.

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why do all good things come to an end? that is one of the mysteries of human existance.

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A red-head, a brunette, and a blonde are playing hide-and-seek. Hide-and-seek is a fun game, so they probably had a great time.

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

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*knock knock* Who's there? *Gorilla* Gorilla who? *Gorillas don't hoot, owls hoot*

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's a women. Why can't Stephen Hawking speak freely with his voice? Because he's autistic.

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Why did the kid fall over? He was hit by a car

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whats blue and fuzzy?.... blue fuzz

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What's small and red that sits in a corner? A baby with a razor blade.

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why did the lady fall on the ground? The cord for the parachute was cut by her husband

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops