What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, he can't come anyway.

Hey I just met you And I am crazy So I will kill you And eat your body

there once was a guy named james who like to play video games he was told one day that he was gay and he immediatley consulted a priest for reconciliation

Knock Knock! Who's there? John Simons. This joke lacks a punchline. Yes, yes it does.

Robin, get in the batmobile.

What do you call a black midget with no legs and has 11 fingers? A human being

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

Scenario- A wedding while skydiving. Problem- The groom lost his parachute. Question- Who stole it? Hint- The Maid of Honor didn't have one either, but he had one on his body when he hit the ground. Answer- The mailman, but he died of old age.

What did one cannibal set to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

whats retarded and looks like a fat duck? GEorge goodburn

Why did was micheal jackson named micheal jackson? because his was

A Black man and a Hispanic man were sitting in the back seat of a car. Who was driving? Their Asian friend who offered to take them to get lunch.

obama's promises

how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop!? thats what she said

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus.

Why did you insult me and then punch me in the face? The hell if you care anymore, I killed you straight after. Neo-Nero. (Rest in peace Nero7 better known as The Moral Man, I hope I can one day live up to your greatness.) Moral: "Keep your spirits up, we are all going to die sometime, but life means nothing if we lose faith in ourselves and each other" Moral 2: "Nero Septimus, that will be my first and last moral that made a figment of fucking sense, if you are watching from whatever comes from life, I know that this is what you would have done, but just so you know and always wanted for us that followed you, I am doing this for my own goddamn fucking self, respects... Now if your ghost is still watching, get the fuck out of my room you damn cripple, and know that your arm is somewhere in the basement because its so goddamn bad ass that it fucking freaks me out, and so fucking heavy that I think you where some sort of superhuman, now gtfo, as you taught us, we cant focus on the goddamn afterlife, if we are gonna get the best out of life and the present, adios amigo"

What's worse then ten dead babies in a garbage can? Being the one who found them.

What's tan, red, black and brown? Your face. Two days later... In the mausoleum. "Your face"

Your mother is a stupid bitch. For real.

How do u get a baby to stop choking? Take ur c*ck out if its mouth!!!

A fat guy runs a marathon. He dies of obesity and dehydration.

thumbs up!

my captcha says : forkin chickens

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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