Q:what has four legs, is green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A:a pool table

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins the china town

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What do you call this? A sentence in English.

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What did the circle say to the square? Ur a square

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Knock Knock Who's there? ImBrewn

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Why dont jews eat pork? Because the torah doesnt allow cannibalism

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How do you kill a Jew? The same way you kill any person. It could be gunshot, strangulation, hanging, poison etc. They are the same as every other human being, so you would kill them just like any other human being.

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69

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Why did the squirl eat the accorn? Because he enjoys it.

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You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

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- Hey, guess how many people are dead in that cemetery? - I don't know. How many? - All of them.

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what is worse than a pile of dead babies? there is one alive at the bottom. what is worse than that? it eats its way out.

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How do you trap a squirrel? You carefully set up a trap and place acorns in the trap.

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Wheelchair high jump

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What do you call a kid on crutches? Crippled

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A guy walks into a bar. Yep.. that's it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It got shot. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What do you get when you cross Sir Elton John with a sabertooth tiger. I don't know but you better keep it away from your ass.

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Why do people eat babies? Because they're delicious.

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I heard a scary rumor that when you plzy a windows istaller cd backwards, it plays a secret message, but what's even scarier, is that when you play it forwards, it installs windows.

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAA HAHAHAaaa WHYYYYYYYYY!?

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Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

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How do you stop a bird from flying? Shoot it with a harpoon gun.

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What did the Homeless man get for Christmas? A dollar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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