Why do basketball players wear bibs? They don't.

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A man goes into a bar. What are mangos doing in a bar?

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Don't worry, I'm not as random as you think I salad

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Knock Knock… Who is there? Orange. Orange Who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana? Actually I really wish you did, because I am Hypokalemic and am about to die you asshole.

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Why is Dominic's nick name big D? Because the first letter in his name is D.

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How do you kill a blonde? By inactivating major functions in the body, for example cutting off the blood supply to the brain.

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Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A nun in a blender.

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Yo momma so ugly she looks like a penis

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Three monkeys are sitting in a tree. Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? -He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -Peer pressure.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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Why is Billy in a ditch? He stepped on a landmine and was promptly burst into many pieces. The ditch was coincidental.

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Why is a blonde a door knob... Because everybody gets a turn

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Whats the Twin Towers least favourite movie? Here Comes the Boom.

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Justin Bieber is a good singer.

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i like pie.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot had a seizure.

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Q- Who is the life of the party? A- hannah schane

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If you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

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whats at the end of the rainbow? Purple

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why are asians eyes so slanted? because THEY WERE BORN THAT WAY!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can do whatever the hell it wants

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What did the dinosaur and John Wayne say to the Easter Bunny? Nothing, they're both dead and the Easter Bunny isn't real.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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