What happened to the peanut who went to NYC? Nothing because he was eaten on the plane

Person 1: Eric is in the hospital! I think it was those depression pills. Person 2: What did he overdose? Person 3: No he just took to much.

A midget walks under a bar

A man goes into a bar. What are mangos doing in a bar?

Statistically speaking, one out if every seven dwarves are unhappy

69

Why did the groom have cold feet? Because he was insecure in his relationship with his soon to be wife.

I just farted, and now I have to Chit!

A white guy, a black guy, and a spanish guy jump off a building. They all die on impact and their families mourn their loss for years to come.

So, a bulldozer rolls into a bar, there is no bar now.

Q: What do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? A: An horse

What did the sting ray say to steve irwin? It doesn't matter , steve irwin is dead, dead as a doormat.

How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Because Goofy can walk on two legs, and is therefore superior to Pluto in Walt Disney's eyes.

It's April Fool's Day and a little boy runs up to his mom. "Daddy hung himself! He's in the attic!" The mom runs up to the attic, but the dad's not there. The boy looks at his mom and says, "April fools! He's in the basement!"

Ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass...! I said "ass" a lot, sorry for the language

My mom fell on our cat and it died.

Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because she had no legs. Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. What did Sally get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally...

Why was the alcoholic unable to pass a stool when he sat down on the toilet? Because he did it on the floor.

How do you survive the plague? you dont.

Why did the chicken eat fried chicken? Because fried chicken is so good! Kelvin Yang.

Knock Knock I don't have a door. I'm Homeless

A baby seal walks into a club.

What did the hooker say to her employer after 1 hour....you owe my $20

Why did the cat eat the cupcake? Cause he was hungry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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