Did you hear about the guy that came out the closet while at school? Yeah, Dylan Hodge is a dick.

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This one sucks!

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A man walks into a bar with tears rolling down his cheeks. The bartender asks why are you so blue? The man says he has blue skin disorder and that everyone has been making fun of him...

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(read this aloud): A man walks into a bar with a giraffe. Him and the giraffe order multiple shots and get hammered. The giraffe on the other hand can't hold his liquor so well, and ends up passing out on the floor of the bar. The man decides to leave him there and take off. On his way out, the bartender yells, "Hey, you can't just leave that lyin' there!" and the man says, "It's not a lion, it's a giraffe!"

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A horse dies and goes to heaven. He wonders why there aren't any atheists around.

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tuna fish dolphins sharks idk

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The 8 year old in my trunk

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Why is a jewish man so tall? Genetics

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Zombies eat brains! (You're safe)

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Why didn't the cheese buy a house plant? Cheese is nonliving and therefore cannot earn money, thus preventing cheese from buying houseplants.

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obama

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What's the difference between erotica and kink? Erotica involves simple arousal; kink usually has an added element of masochism.

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So a white president,a mexican president, and a black president,are on a plane and its going down. The white president wishes he was a dove, and he flies away to safety. Then the mexican president wishes he was an eagle and he flies away to safety. Then the black president falls out the plane and says o s**t and turns into poop.

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How do you turn a frown upside down? You cannot do such a thing because frowning is the act of sadness. Therefore you cannot nor should not change a persons attitude.

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You are walking down the street, and a man keeps on getting in your way. You want to politely... Screw it already and stab him in the back

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Want to here a joke? The First Amendment.

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What is the difference between a motorcycle and a football? 42, because ice cream has no bones.

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a girl and a guy rented a hotel room for a night. theyre siblings and stayed up all night watching very classy movies about farm animals and each of them ordered a chocolate cake to eat while watching their fantastic informational film.

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Why does little susie enjoy her life? Because it was her birthday 364 days ago.

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shitted on em put your numbah 2s in the air if ya did it on em

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What's the difference between slavery and the Holocaust? Slavery happened.

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Q) Why was six afraid of seven? A) Seven was black.

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Christians pornstars.

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How do you make a blonde stupid as hell. Give birth to it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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