What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are people, and are a nation and ethnoreligious group originating in the Israelites or Hebrews of the Ancient Near East. A pizza on the other hand is an Italian dish made up of cheese, bread sauces and multiple toppings.

A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

What is the difference between a rat and an italian? nothing.

Knock knock ... *No ones home*

What do you do when you have those days where you feel that you go back three damn steps for every step you take towards your goal? DUUUUUH! You turn your back, see? Now you are getting three steps at the right direction for every right one! LOGIC!

How do you know if a girl is special? If she hates justin bieber, Twilight, and is open to threeways.

Whats yellow pink and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? Oh were you expecting an answer here, if i knew the answer i wouldn't have asked a question.

I went to the game and saw a Mexican wave. So I waved back at him.

stuarts mum

Why can't a blonde woman drive? because she was shot in both legs and cannot operate the pedals without extreme pain.

Why'd the man go to jail? Because he had a piece of cheese.

Why was Osama Bin Laden killed? Because he couldn't dodge all the bullets in time

Why did little Lucy climb up a tree? Cos her dad beats her.

Why did the man go bald? He had cancer

What's funny? At the exact moment you read this, someone is suffering from domestic abuse.

ahhh finally removed the splinter I've had for quite some time now. Hopefully that was the last one I'll get for a while...touch wood

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? She had no friends.

Q; Why to did the chef jump off of a cliff wearing an Elmo suit? A; Because he felt like it. It;s a free country

why did the chicken cross the road it was being chased by the man from the chicken slaughter house.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey Nick!" Because he knows him and is not racist.

What's are the screams and terror when midnight hits? Vannlia Ice's face.

Your mama is so fat she suffered from diabetes and died of heart failure .

Why did I get raped

What happened when a Blonde girl and a Ginger man have sex without a condom? The woman gets pregnant and then after about nine months the woman gives birth and the child grows up, when the child is adolescent it is able to reproduce and the process continues again.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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